Winning hearts

Here are 11 pieces of advice to help you in winning others hearts. My pieces of advice are like arrows that aim at shooting hearts as its only target. I mean here, to be the virtuous merits, that captivate others hearts and help in overcoming imperfections. Actually, such merits have their own effective power in charming hearts.

O you who is in love with Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) and your brothers in Islam, here are the arrows; be careful with them, try hard to be a clever shooter… And pray to Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) to help you.

1. Smile : It is the first arrow and the fastest of them all. It is like the salt for food. It is also regarded as a kind of worship and alms-giving as is mentioned in a hadith “Smiling at your brother’s face is as charity (Sadaqa)”. Abdullah ibn al Harith tells us about the Prophet (peace be upon him) saying that he had never seen someone smile at the other’s face as the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) used to do. Be always the one who initiates greetings:This arrow is the one that lets you to be in the innermost depths of the others hearts. This arrow needs a skillful shooter. The needed skills are the hearty smile, the warm shaking of hands and the friendly welcoming to the other. Being successfully achieved, such kinds of skills are going to be rewarded, referring to the hadith: “In greetings, the better is he who initiates greeting the other”.Umar al Nadi tells us that he went out once with Umar ibn al Khattab’s son. While walking, he found him saluting all whom he met, whether being old or young. Al Hasan al-Basri also said “Shaking hands strengthens brotherhood feelings”. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said “Do not ever waste your good deeds, even by meeting your brother with a frowning face.” He said also “Shaking hands removes hatred and exchanging presents enhances love and ends enmity”.
2. The Presents: It has a strange charming affection that captivates all senses. Hence, exchanging presents and gifts in different occasions is a pleasant habit however gifts should be within one’s tolerable expenses. Ibrahim al Zahri tells us about his father saying “ My father got a sum of money as a reward , in due , he asked me to send donations to his family members and friends . As we were about to finish , he asked me “ Have we missed any one?” I answered “No!” He said “I think that we did.” He continued ”We have missed someone whose welcome to me was really warm. Would you please send him this sum of money?” Look how he loved the man and wished to reward him for his warm welcome.
3. Be silent….speak in what benefits. Loud voice and chattering are bad merits. You have to be sweet-worded, tender in expressing yourself. Concerning this merit, The Prophet (peace be upon him) said “The good word is a charity (is a sadaqa).” If the good word has its own magic in winning the hearts of your enemies how powerfully it would work then with your brothers’ hearts!! Here the Prophet’s wife addresses the enemies saying “Damn you” and the Prophet (peace be upon him) prevents her saying “Calm down. Allah likes for the matters to be dealt with gently”. He also said: “Nobility of manners and taciturnity are the best of manners that people are ever characterized by”.The poet says also: The pious Allah-fearing may keep silent, in spite of being eloquent.Be a good listener: It is to listen patiently and never interrupt the speaker, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) never interrupted a speaker till he ended his speech. And he who fights for this merit gains others love and admiration, whilst on the contrary is the one who chatters and interrupts the other. Atta` tells us about how he behaves concerning this merit and says “When someone speaks to me , I listen to him as if it is the first time I have heard this subject, though I have heard it thousands of times before.
4. Appearance and dressing well: You have to be careful with your appearance so as to be neat, well –dressed and sweet smelling as well. The Prophet (peace be upon him) says that Allah loves beauty to be in every thing. Umar Ibn Al Khattab said also “I like the young man who is sweetly perfumed and cleanly dressed.” Abdullah Ibn Ahmad Ibn Hanbal tells us about his father saying “ I’ve never seen some one who is as caring to the cleanliness of his dress , his hair , his moustache and other undesirable body hair as Ahmad Ibn Hanbal used to do”
5. Being in others favor and helping them: Concerning this, the poet says: Good treatment of the other is the only way of captivating his heart. Good treatment you classifies you as an obedient, beloved slave of Allah as the Prophet (peace be upon him) Muhammad says “The more you are in favor of others, the more you are beloved by Allah” as Allah says in the Quran “And spend of your substance in the cause of Allah, and make not your own hands contribute to (your) destruction; but do good; for Allah loveth those who do good” (Al-Baqarah:195)
6. The poet says also: Be a dear friend to all, whom you know,For all, you should be as freshening as iced pure water I really wonder for that man who pays money to buy slaves, while he can buy those who are free by being good to them, for those (who treat other well) find many to be in their help.
7. Being Generous : Offering money is the key for most of the closed doors that hinder you from reaching others hearts, especially in these days. Now I will tell you a story about the magic of the merit of generosity. In the conquest of Makkah, there was a man called “Safwan Ibn Umia”. That man ran away after making all possible means in keeping the people of Islam and after making conspiracies to kill the Prophet (peace be upon him). Later on, the Prophet (peace be upon him) forgave him and he came back asking the Prophet (peace be upon him) to give him the time of two months to think about Islam and the Prophet (peace be upon him) said “You can take four months, not just two”. In spite of being an atheist, he accompanied the Prophet (peace be upon him) in the Hunain and Al Ta’if conquests. In Al Ta`if, while the Prophet (peace be upon him) was dividing the booties of the war, he noticed that man looking longingly to a vast land in which a large number of cattle were flocking. The Prophet (peace be upon him) asked him “Do you like it?” The man eagerly answered “Yes.” The Prophet (peace be upon him) said “It is for you then.” Safwan said “Only a prophet could behave as generously as you have to me. I believe that there is no God but Allah and that Muhammad is His prophet.” Notice how the Prophet (peace be upon him) found the missing key and succeeded in moving his heart. Some people behave stingily as if they see the ghost of poverty waiting to attack them once they think about being generous in offering money.
8. To have a good opinion of others and to give them an excuse : Keeping an eye on others behavior is a bad merit that blocks your way to their hearts. On the contrary is to have a good opinion of them. So, try hard to give your brothers the excuse as much as you can. Concerning this merit, Ibn Al Mubarak says also “The believer is he who gives his brothers the excuse , and the hypocrite is he who seeks their slips.”
9. Express your feelings… instantly: If you loved someone, or felt good feelings about him, don’t wait, just tell him at once. Regarding this, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said “ If you felt the brotherly love of Islam towards any ,you should immediately go and tell him about your feelings.” He added “It is the way relations are to be strongly indicated”. Such love is to be blessed by Allah if it is for Allah’s sake, not for any other personal affairs such as seeking high position, money, fame etc…. Unless this love is for Allah’s sake, it is a fruitless kind of brotherhood then. When they meet each other on the Day of Judgement, they are not brothers any more but enemies, as Allah says in the Quran “ Friends on that Day will be foes, one to another; except the Righteous.” (Az-Zukhruf: 67) The Prophet (peace be upon him) says “A man is in the company of whom he loved.” By this he means that on the Day of Judgment, a person will be with whom he loved. So, we have to choose then between two kinds of societies, one is in enmity and the other is a kind brotherly one. Hence, we find that the Prophet (peace be upon him) associated the Makkan immigrants and the Medinan followers as brothers. It was a rare kind of brotherhood that even two brothers were to be buried together in one grave after being martyred in the conquests. Means of brotherhood was always being indicated by the Prophet (peace be upon him) as he says “You are not allowed to enter heaven till you believe in Allah and you will not be true believers unless you love each other. Shall I tell you something to do that indicates love between you? It is to spread salutation of Peace among you.” The pity is that people are always either cruelly and harshly treating each other or extremely tender that they adore each other. Actually, it is a matter of striking a balance between heart and mind, something that differs according to the difference of characters and circumstances. It is absolutely a blessing given by Allah.
10. Sociability : It is the art of being social. Here, a kind of misconception could exist between sociability and hypocrisy. Could you differentiate between the two meanings? The Prophet (peace be upon him)’s wife, Aisha said “A man came to visit us, but to my surprise, once the Prophet (peace be upon him) saw him, he said “O…that ill- mannered man”, but the Prophet (peace be upon him) changed completely once he sat with him. He welcomed the man warmly, smiling in his face. When the man left, I asked the Prophet (peace be upon him) about what had surprised me; how he considered this man as being bad, and how he talked to him in such warmth? The Prophet (peace be upon him) answered “Have you ever seen me behaving as a hypocrite?” He added “In the Day of Judgement, the worst degrees are for those whom people deserted for being mistreated by them.”Al Qurtubi differentiates between hypocrisy and sociability, regarding sociability as a desirable legal behavior, saying that sociability means sacrificing the worldly affairs for the sake of improving either life on earth or religion, or so as to improve both, while hypocrisy aims at sacrificing religion for the sake of the worldly affairs. Hence, being sociable for ill-mannered people is aiming to achieve two purposes:Firstly, to avoid being mistreated by them. Secondly, being good to them could be guidance for them to step the right way. Compliments should be within worldly affairs only, never in religious affairs, otherwise, it will be a matter of hypocrisy.
11. To be sociable, means to be tender, smiling, praising to the other, intending in the meantime a legal benefit. The Prophet (peace be upon him) says “Being sociable, is as alms-giving.” Ibn Battal says also “Sociability is an ethic of the believers; it is to show open-mindedness in treating others and to delicately speak to them. Both are important elements in seeking reasons for intimacy”

How to convert to Islam.

Category: Religion and Philosophy

How to Convert to Islam and Become a Muslim..>

The steps a person needs to take to accept Islam as his/her religion, enter its fold, and become a Muslim.
By IslamReligion.com - Published on 27 Feb 2006 - Last modified on 03 Feb 2007
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.. The word "Muslim" means one who submits to the will of God, regardless of their race, nationality or ethnic background. Becoming a Muslim is a simple and easy process that requires no pre-requisites. One may convert alone in privacy, or he/she may do so in the presence of others.

If anyone has a real desire to be a Muslim and has full conviction and strong belief that Islam is the true religion of God, then, all one needs to do is pronounce the "Shahada", the testimony of faith, without further delay. The "Shahada" is the first and most important of the five pillars of Islam.

With the pronunciation of this testimony, or "Shahada", with sincere belief and conviction, one enters the fold of Islam.

Upon entering the fold of Islam purely for the Pleasure of God, all of one's previous sins are forgiven, and one starts a new life of piety and righteousness. The Prophet said to a person who had placed the condition upon the Prophet in accepting Islam that God would forgive his sins:
"Do you not know that accepting Islam destroys all sins which come before it?" (Saheeh Muslim)
When one accepts Islam, they in essence repent from the ways and beliefs of their previous life. One need not be overburdened by sins committed before their acceptance, but if the sin involved usurping a right of another human, such as stealing, then they should strive their utmost to return what was wrongly taken. The person's record is clean, and it is as if he was just born from his mother's womb. One should try as much as possible to keep his records clean and strive to do as many good deeds as possible.

The Holy Quran and Hadeeth both stress the importance of following Islam. God states:
"The only religion in the sight of God is Islam." (Quran 3:19)

In another verse of the Holy Quran, God states:
"If anyone desires a religion other than Islam, never will it be accepted of him; and in the Hereafter, he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (their selves in the Hellfire)." (Quran 3:85)

In another saying, Muhammad, the Prophet of God, said:
"Whoever testifies that there in none worthy of being worshipped but God, Who has no partner, and that Muhammad is His slave and Prophet, and that Jesus is the Slave of God, His Prophet, and His word[1] which He bestowed in Mary and a spirit created from Him; and that Paradise (Heaven) is true, and that the Hellfire is true, God will eventually admit him into Paradise, according to his deeds." (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)

The Prophet of God, may God praise him, also reported "Indeed God has forbidden to reside eternally in Hell the person who says: "I testify that none has the right to worship except Allah (God),' seeking thereby the Face of God." (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)
The Declaration of the Testimony (Shahada) The testimony can be declared by saying the following statement with conviction and understanding its meaning:

I testify "La ilah illa Allah, Muhammad rasoolu Allah"
The translation of which is:
"I testify that there is no true god (deity) but God (Allah), and Muhammad is the Messenger (Prophet) of God."
The first part of the testimony consists of the most important truth that God revealed to mankind: that there is nothing divine or worthy of being worshipped except for Almighty God. God states in the Holy Quran:

"We did not send the Messenger before you without revealing to him: 'none has the right to be worshipped except I, therefore worship Me.'" (Quran 21:25)

This conveys that all forms of worship, whether it be praying, fasting, invoking, seeking refuge in, and offering an animal as sacrifice, must be directed to God and to God alone. Directing any form of worship to other than God (whether it be an angel, a messenger, Jesus, Muhammad, a saint, an idol, the sun, the moon, a tree) is seen as a contradiction to the fundamental message of Islam, and it is an unforgivable sin unless it is repented from before one dies. All forms of worship must be directed to God only.

Worship means the performance of deeds and sayings that please God, things which He commanded or encouraged to be performed, either by direct textual proof or by analogy. Thus, worship is not restricted to the implementation of the five pillars of Islam, but also includes every aspect of life. Providing food for one's family, and saying something pleasant to cheer a person up are also considered acts of worship, if such is done with the intention of pleasing God. This means that, to be accepted, all acts of worship must be carried out sincerely for the Sake of God alone.

The second part of the testimony means that Prophet Muhammad is the servant and chosen messenger of God. This implies that one obeys and follows the commands of the Prophet. One must believe in what he has said, practice his teachings and avoid what he has forbidden. One must therefore worship God only according to his teaching alone, for all the teachings of the Prophet were in fact revelations and inspirations conveyed to him by God.
One must try to mold their lives and character and emulate the Prophet, as he was a living example for humans to follow. God says:

"And indeed you are upon a high standard of moral character." (Quran 68:4)
God also said:

"And in deed you have a good and upright example in the Messenger of God, for those who hope in the meeting of God and the Hereafter, and mentions God much." (Quran 33:21)

He was sent in order to practically implement the Quran, in his saying, deeds, legislation as well as all other facets of life. Aishah, the wife of the Prophet, when asked about the character of the Prophet, replied:

"His character was that of the Quran." (As-Suyooti) To truly adhere to the second part of the Shahada is to follow his example in all walks of life. God says:

"Say (O Muhammad to mankind): 'If you (really) love God, then follow me.'" (Quran 3:31)
It also means that Muhammad is the Final Prophet and Messenger of God, and that no (true) Prophet can come after him.
"Muhammad is not the father of any man among you but he is the Messenger of God and the last (end) of the Prophets and God is Ever All-Aware of everything." (Quran 33:40)
All who claim to be prophets or receive revelation after Muhammad are imposters, and to acknowledge them would be tantamount to disbelief.

We welcome you to Islam, congratulate you for your decision, and will try to help you in any way we can.

Many Hispanics are finding Faith In Islam.

PETER MONSEES/THE RECORD
Gaby Gonzalez, right, a 20-year-old student at Montclair State University, is one of a growing number of Hispanics drawn to the Muslim faith.

Published Saturday, March 11, 2006

Many Hispanics Are Finding Faith in Islam

Some mosques have set up special Latino Muslim groups.By ELIZABETH LLORENTEThe Record (Hackensack N.J.)
HACKENSACK, N.J. -- Last year, Gaby Gonzalez wore black nail polish and black eye shadow. She had a messy room, standoffs with mom and occasional drinks.Today, the Honduran-born 20year-old is known as Sister Gaby.She proudly wears her jade-green hijab, which forms a nearly perfect frame around her delicate features and large brown eyes. She prays several times a day and does not wear makeup, eat pork or even utter the phrase "happy hour" -- that is all haram, she said, or prohibited in Arabic."In my past, I focused on myself. I didn't think about other people, about my parents, just myself and my circle of friends," she said. "Now, every day I strive to be better, to do good, to help others. I stopped being selfish and arrogant."Gonzalez, who majors in anthropology at Montclair State University, is one of thousands of Latinos who have converted to Islam. So many Latinos have thronged to Islam in recent years that many mosques, including some in North Jersey, have set up special Latino Muslim groups within their congregations. And many now offer simultaneous Spanish translations as part of their religious services.After the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, mosque leaders saw the fear and anger mushrooming against Muslims and decided to reach out to non-Muslim organizations and community groups to demystify Islam and to condemn terrorism."When we reached out, we weren't even thinking of Hispanics; we didn't know much about Hispanics," said Mohammed AlHayek, the imam at the Islamic Educational Center of North Hudson, in Union City, N.J. "But they were the ones who responded. That's when we realized that our outreach focus had to be specifically Hispanics."Al-Hayek brought in the head of a mosque in Ecuador and asked him to go out into the immigrant enclaves of Hudson County and talk about Islam. For four months, the Ecuadorean went out into the crowded streets of Union City and the surrounding towns, and encouraged people to ask questions about Islam and Muslims. He also visited homes and spoke to local organizations."Here was a Latino, someone the people in the Hispanic community could relate to, speaking to them in their own language about Islam," said Al-Hayek, a thin man with a friendly face and wide smile. "It wasn't Arabs speaking to them, and at the beginning especially, that made a big difference."The mosque's efforts have paid off. Since Al-Hayek began the outreach program five years ago, some 500 Hispanics have visited the mosque, sitting in prayer sessions as guests and attending seminars on Islam. Many converted, usually from Catholicism. Now, Al-Hayek said, of the approximately 1,000 people who regularly worship at the mosque, nearly 200 are Hispanic converts.Hispanics and Muslims note that their communities have much in common -- tight-knit families, reverence for their elders and a tendency to dote on children. They also note that Islam is a core part of the history of Spain, where Muslim Moors ruled for about 800 years. And many Spanish words, they say, come from Arabic."They're coming back to their roots," Al-Hayek said.The sound of Spanish now fills the air at many mosques. On Wednesday night at the mosque in Union City, a group of Hispanic converts spoke Spanish among themselves, with the more veteran ones teaching the newest mosque members how to put on a hijab."I don't understand a word they're saying," said Mariam Abbassi, whose eyes darted back and forth as she strained to figure out the conversations. "I'm trying to learn. But it's a pleasure having them here."Like many Hispanics who embrace Islam, Gonzalez came from a family of devout Catholics. Back in Honduras, her grandmother insisted that Gonzalez strictly adhere to the religion."My grandmother whipped me if I didn't go to church, if I didn't read the Bible," she said. "It wasn't something for me that was allowed to develop naturally."Here, she discovered punk rock music and the punk lifestyle, and for a sheltered Honduran in her teenage years, it was alluring and liberating."I was always stressed out, doing things I shouldn't do," Gonzalez said. "I prayed to be led to the right path."During a college course that looked at different religions, Gonzalez became intrigued by Islam."I read more and more about Islam," she said. "I wanted to know what it was that led so many people to submit entirely to this religion. When I read the Quran, I found the truth. It spoke about serving others, putting others first."Islam made her feel anchored.FAMILY REACTIONSBut Gonzalez learned that becoming Muslim comes at a price. Some Hispanic converts say they encounter objections from relatives, some of whom have disowned their newly Muslim daughters, sons and grandkids. They find themselves defending their new lifestyles against taunts and warnings by fellow Hispanics about getting recruited into terrorist organizations and losing their freedom to cult-like pressures.Gonzalez's conversion stunned her friends; some stopped speaking to her. Her parents objected, and she stayed at a friend's home for a while. Even when she found acceptance among some relatives and friends, she said, people disapproved of her veil -- a common point of contention, for it is a very tangible, very public expression of devotion to Islam."Most of my family is bigoted against Muslims," said Vincent Gallardo, a student at William Paterson University who converted to Islam two years ago. "A close friend stopped speaking to me," he said. "My mother was very hurt. A Latino co-worker always called out to me: `Hey Taliban, how's it going?"'

El Lago de Sal.. in English

The Salt

Once an unhappy young man came to an old master and told he was very sad and asked for a solution.

The old Master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it. "How does it taste?" the Master asked. "Awful," spat the apprentice. The Master chuckled and then asked the young man to take another handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake and when the apprentice swirled his handful of salt into the lake, the old man said, "Now drink from the lake."

As the water dripped down the young man's chin, the Master asked, "How does it taste?" " G ood!" remarked the apprentice. "Do you taste the salt?" asked the Master. "No," said the young man. The Master sat beside this troubled young man, took his hands, and said,

"The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the same, exactly the same. But the amount we taste the 'pain' depends on the container we put it into. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things ..... Stop being a glass. Become a lake!"


Compiled, edited and adapted by Khalid Latif

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